My son reported an incident Friday that has caused me to think somewhat on the changes in our society. Sometimes, it seems, a theme arises from disparate incidents and this does seem to be the case.
He was with his girlfriend and they were driving in the city. Ahead of them a truck attempted to change lanes and overlooked the black car in the lane next to him, my son assumed it was in the driver's blind-spot. As soon as the driver saw the vehicle, he swerved back into his lane without incident, but then began to attempt to make the necessary change of lanes. The driver of the black car was obviously angered and swerved toward the truck menacingly. No matter what the driver of the truck did, the driver of the black car thwarted his attempts to make the lane change.
At the next light, my son and his girlfriend were horrified when the driver of the black car hopped out of his car and approached the partially opened window of the drivers side of the truck with an open hunting knife in his hand. My son rolled his window down in order to hear what was said, brave young man that he is. While threatening the driver of the truck verbally, the driver of the car made thrusting motions with his knife toward the other man, particularly toward his neck.
When the light changed and the man in the car took off, my son followed him to get his license tag number. Again, he was almost too brave and shadowed the black car very closely, he said. He succeeded and then the Ike and his girlfriend went to the police department to report the incident. While there, he saw that the driver of the truck was already there reporting what had happened.
I told my son that I was very proud of him for doing that, although I suggested he might have followed the black car a little more cautiously. And momentarily, boor that I can be, I said that when I was young road rage was never heard of--of course, there is nothing new under the sun and I know it, but it didn't occur often enough to be labeled road rage until about twenty years ago. But what intrigues me is why this is happening to people. Why has anger been getting more and more out of control? Greater minds than mine have pondered these questions, I'm sure. Perhaps it is my writer's mind that wants to mull over the causes of behavior in my own way. Our conversation while eating at Chili's drifted off onto other subjects, but my mind kept returning to it in lax moments over the past few days.
One thing that Ike had responded to, in our discussion, had been that the man was older, most likely in his forties, he thought. Ike does not think his own generation is prone to this sort of anger, but what he calls, "Generation X". I think it might be the following "Me generation". I actually think it was the "Me half-century," truth be told, as we grew more and more selfish toward the close of the last century. And this is selfishness at its worst.
Oh, about a decade ago, my Son-in-Law would talk about people making what he called "forced lane changes". These people apparently irritated him no end and he would take steps to obstruct their efforts. Frankly, at the time, I was confused because I could not figure out exactly what he meant by the term or why someone would do that--unless it were necessary for them and they were just driving. I have often seen this done since and I have been the victim of it, too, and I am always stymied as to the selfishness of this act. Wouldn't these same people be equally irritated if they were the one in need of a change of lane into a crowded lane in order to catch an exit only to have someone stop them by speeding up, slowing down and whatever else it took to keep them stuck in the wrong lane? And some of these exits these days, if missed, could take a person a long way out of their way to get back to where then needed to go. And why the anger over what anybody else feels a need to do, anyway? It just takes years off our lives, that's all. And sometimes more.
Consideration is a forgotten word! That is what has been lost in this increasingly selfish and impersonal world that we are living in. At one time, people helped each other--even strangers. We would open doors for those carrying a heavy load or allow a person with one item into the check-out que ahead of us if we had less and we would hold back to allow the driver of a car to get into the flow of traffic--we would even wave them in. And it didn't cost us much in time or effort. It made life easier for us all. In actual fact, it is rewarding to help others. At least, that has been my experience. But anger and selfishness are catching, like a disease. This man with his knife is a murderer looking for a victim--over a lane change!
Last night before my son left home to return to his apartment in the city, we were watching videos while eating our dinner. It is the season for Hallowe'en ghosts and goblins and anything that causes a slight chill to creep up the spine. A video he chose showed how in Japan there is a forest in the shadow of Mt. Fuji that has become a favorite suicide spot, the second most used spot in all the world second only to the Golden Gate Bridge. The creators of the video seemed to be a bit thin on evidence, but we watched them walk through the odd looking Japanese forest, prod at this or that, shake out an abandoned backpack, etc. And then we watched another even better video that, at first, appeared to be more professionally made and more factual. They even showed an actual skeleton--or at least did a good job of creating the effect. Oddly enough, the subject material slowly deteriorated into new-age postulation as to why this spot was so popular for suicide.
As I said, it seemed to mark a theme for the weekend in disparate ways but perhaps with a common cause. In a world where we are increasingly faceless and meaningless to the general flow of life around us, we begin to act more and more selfishly and the result, it seems to me, is a denial of the importance of others and concern for others which is our nature.
I would contrast it to a recent show I watched on PBS about the history of England based on the history of one small town in approximately the center of the country that was like a microcosm of the entire kingdom since before the Norman Conquest. For an American who lives without real roots, it is profoundly interesting to realize that for most of mankind's history, there was very little mobility and the same family lived in the same town from the first time a last name was recorded shortly after 1066 up to this very day, and evidence suggests that a town had been located there for centuries before that. To think that same last name would be mentioned again and again in the history of that town and that of all their neighbors, as well, and children could go to a memorial and see their own ancestor's name inscribed in it. It was a place where my great-great grandfather and my neighbor's great-great grandfather knew each other--it would be like a town of siblings! Everybody knowing the history of all their neighbors, everybody sharing the same history and nobody "faceless" or unfamiliar.
I hope my son's generation is more passive and more considerate and I hope it stays that way. I wonder if we could take steps to alleviate the causes of anger due to impersonalization of others.
I highly recommend the PBS Special (this is just the preview but all three segments are available at PBS.org): Michael Wood's Story of England
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